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Colon Calamity

A collection of 5 issues

Red 40 Combustion and the Clown Car

So here we are Socket Seekers, I had to work today so you get a blog or are being punished with a blog. As it turns out, Red 40 and Lexapro both boost serotonin. Mix them together, and your colon goes into immediate overdrive, transforming your backside into a high-

The Red 40 Sibling Experiment and Chanting Cookies

Welcome the fuck back Socket Seekers. It's confirmed: I curse too much. I am fully aware of it, and I show absolutely no signs of stopping or giving a... well, you know. I led another day of work training today. You should honestly pity my trainee; I am

Rectal Rocketry and the Meme Delay

So I don't have a lot to say today Socket Seekers. Calm down, we don't need the noisemakers and confetti. My brother texted me, "Is this true?" then nothing. He, of course, doesn't know about my top-secret transness. So then he

Sibling Pressures and Global Logistics

A quick return, Socket Seekers. My brother is in town and he doesn't know I have been writing, but the way I have been talking to people has shifted. People are noticing, I think it's the way I describe things or something. They start talking and

Four Quadrants and Four Identical Albums

Socket Seekers, you are lucky I am not feeling chatty today, I am writing this in an explicit effort to resist doing my therapy homework—an assignment that will probably help me, but we don't acknowledge such things here. I have had to do these exact same four-