The Fog-Shifting Protocol

Welcome to the big time shift, Socket Seekers.

The past few weeks, I have been living in a legally prescribed, drug-fueled fog. In an effort to find my way out—and to test if I can tolerate the verbal garbage that the human race insists on spewing—yesterday I shifted my Lexapro from its fog-shifting pole-position spot at 6:30 AM to 1:00 PM. The plan that I came up with is to step it to 9:00 PM. That way, the brain fog and hyper-speed thinking will happen when I am asleep. I am sure that the spinning thoughts and fog won't create a massive amount of nightmares.

In a stroke of luck, my couch has not asked for more slushie, so moving my meds may have silenced that one voice—only 124 more to go. It didn't turn as purple as I had hoped, so I may need to track down the makers of the food dye and see if I can buy it in volume. We will see if that idea is a medication side effect soon.

Another side effect, or possible issue, is that the Sun is trying to blind me. I may need to retreat to my bed and hide under my blankets. My agoraphobia leaves me with the complexion of a vampire, and I may spontaneously burst into flames.

Useless Recap:

• Lexapro + mornings is bad.
• Human verbal garbage might be better in a fog.
• Signs point to me being undead.
• New med routine is probably ill-advised.

Disclaimer: Screw you, Lexapro, you made this med like this. I am not apologizing. Just don't sue; I can't give up slushies. I run on them.